Did I tell you about...?
Nick Lowe! Nick Lowe! Why aren't our charts full of his songs instead of the product of Schlock, Airbrush, and Whitewash?
Did I tell you...?
That Elvis Costello was sporting an astonishing pair of grips. That some daft sod shouted: "Give us some of your politics, Elvis" to be met with the withering response, Why, have you finished with yours?
That if the rent-a-quote band of Tory MPs had been in Glasgow last night instead of waiting to be told what was on The Late Show, they wouldn't have been out of the papers for weeks.
That I doubted whether Elvis could carry off the stance of The Beloved (solo) entertainer in the home of Glasgow vaudeville where antique bills on the bar wall advertise The Two Leslies, Charlie Kunz, and Irish Nights of 1936 with Harry O'Donovan.
Did I tell...?
That the Swede who invented self-assembly furniture got what was coming to him. That Elvis has still got THAT SNEER for the crasser element in the audience. That a medley means seamlessly lacing together songs, only a few of which he's written: "New Amsterdam" / "You've Got To Hide Your Love" / "American Without Tears"; "Pump It Up" / "I Feel Pretty"; and best of all "Radio Sweetheart" with Van Morrison's "Jackie Wilson Said."
Mention that "I Want You" is the finest tortured love song ever written and that we were privileged to hear it.
Look, just tell me to shut up then. Where were you anyway?